The reason why I came back to the house of lunatics

Prior to living here in the house of lunatics, I was living on my own, renting an apartment in another city. I had just finished a contract and was contemplating my future.

I had decided I wasn't too excited about doing more IT work, that I wanted to work on my own projects, without the pressure of a job. I also decided to take on a project which involved creating a site to sell all the knick-knacks my mother collects. We would split the proceeds 50:50, maybe even 60:40 (in my favour), given that I was doing all the work, creating the site, photographing and uploading the items, listing the items, packaging and posting them to client, as well as maintaining the site. My mother was simply buying them at very little cost.

She persuaded me to come back to live her, so that I didn't have to keep on travelling the 3-4 hours every few weeks to collect the items.

Once I got back here, I got really sick. I had some sort of viral infection (it seemed like chronic fatigue syndrome to me) as well as having hundreds of heart palpitations every day (my heart has been checked out and nothing intrinsically wrong with it). I was exhausted and feverish most days. Needless to say, the web site didn't happen for a while.

Then my brother LayZ boy came to live here too when his wife kicked him out and the rest is documented here - about his lunacy.

Once I am out of this house, away from these crazy, volatile, angry people, I wont have to be subjected to their angry tirades and volatile outbursts, it will be much better for me, because I wont be upset every day. Whatever idiotic things they want to do or say, I wont be exposed to it and that will make my life much better! I can then get on with my life and find my better life!

The volatile emotions and behaviour of my family

Yesterday morning, my mother went ballistic at me, just after I woke up. What a nice way to be woken up? Someone yelling at you!

She was upset that I woke up late. She couldn't fathom the fact that I was sick the day before from her son using such strongly perfumed bathroom products (and in a girly-type smell) which produced an asthma-like cough in me, as well as a number of allergic symptoms, which she was witness to.

Today, she tells me that there is nothing wrong with me, that it's "all in your head". That is just infuriating. She really talks in such a ridiculous way sometimes.

Then she began to tell me that the things she and my step-father bought for me when I moved into my own place several years ago (even though I told her she didn't need to) was now a "loan" and they decided that they wanted them back. And that I had "nothing", which she knows is untrue. But again, just aimed to infuriate and upset me, because apparently she was upset and wanted to take it out on me, as she thinks she can.

I didn't stay there long, I left within about 15 minutes of this constant yelling at me, telling me I had to leave because they wanted to vacuum and as I cant be around vacuum cleaners due to my severe allergies (multiple chemical sensitivities and dust mite allergy, among allergies to other substances). Both my mother and step-father hate it that I have allergies because it means I can no longer be their slave and clean everything for them any more!

I stayed away for about six hours and when I came back, my mother's mood was normal. She told me that I could have the soup she made if I wanted to. I told her I had bought some prawns and was going to cook them for dinner.

Then, when I was in the kitchen/family room, my mother asked me if I could close the clasp on her chain. I asked her why didn't she ask her husband or her son and not the person (me) who she was bagging out terribly this morning. So she just laughed about that and cajoled me into doing it. Then she wanted to give me a kiss thanks. I told her to leave me alone, I didn't need a kiss on the cheek from her.

This constant variation in behaviour drives me crazy. I just don't know what to expect from them. They fly off the handle at the most innocuous things, yet then when they want something, they are so nice to me. Such users! They are just too volatile in their behaviour and I can never predict how they are going to behave from one minute to the next, so I stay away from them mostly, to try to prevent getting abused or attacked.

They simply have no ability to control their emotions or behave like normal people.

And today, again shows me that they are the problem, not me. My behaviour remains fairly constant, but it's theirs that is completely volatile and without any sense whatsoever!  What a family!

Idiotic, ignorant, stupid family that I have

These people who call themselves my family are beyond idiotic, beyond ignorant and beyond stupid.

They seem to think that because they cant smell something, therefore I cannot either and therefore, it's all my head, that I am not allergic to anything and I am lying. It is completely infuriating to deal with idiots like them.

I keep trying to reason with them, by telling them that they don't have severe allergies, they don't get sinusitis, they don't sneeze at dust, they don't have hay fever, like me, so how are they in a position to tell me what I can or cant be allergic to? They continue to deny that there is an issue.

They all know I have multiple chemical sensitivities, that I am highly allergic and cannot be around anyone with lots of perfumed products anywhere on their body because my immune system over-reacts and I get major allergic symptoms, which make me feel like shit. And I cant take conventional medicines because I get really bad side effects from them, so I am totally stuck feeling like crap because the idiots wont listen and respect my illness and show some compassion and kindness to me. I know, it's too much to ask for, from ignorant idiots like them.

It's my mother who is a total and utter bitch. My idiot brother LayZ boy does things to be vindictive and retaliatory, by spraying himself with every perfumed product he has and parading up and down the hallway, leaving his room open so the aroma can pervade the whole area (towards my bedroom) and she simple refuses point blank to recognise that he's doing things on purpose because he knows I will get sick and then she tells me she cannot smell anything, so therefore there is no smell. She's lying. And because of this, it gives that vindictive fucking asshole of a brother LayZ boy permission to keep doing it, because his mother wont do anything to stop him. And of course I just get sicker. God help me! And I am not even religious, but I need someone to help me!

I showed two of the videos of the night they were being abusive a week ago to this woman I know who owns a small store and she was absolutely shocked. She couldn't stop shaking her head and her mouth was totally agape, as she was shocked, beyond words. I have told her how horrible they are to me, but a video image of the actual situation is far more effective at showing the disgusting reality and is more shocking because of its intense abuse and violence. I said to her, "See what kind of family I have?" and she responded with, "It's not a family." No kidding! No-one should have to put up with he violent and abusive crap I have had to put up with, ever. It's totally and utterly disgusting!

The more people that see how disgusting my family, the more people that can see their vile behaviour, the better I will feel, because then they will know what kind of shit I have been subjected to all these years from the violent, volatile and abusive idiots!

Mocking me and dismissing me

All this family does is to mock me, abuse me and dismiss me.

They have not changed since I was a child and having LayZ boy living here, it brings the old dynamics to the fore ever more. He is mentally unwell. Anyone that hears how he really behaves and what he really says to me say the same thing: "LayZ boy is sick in the head, he is violent and abusive and not a normal person." LayZ boy is a coward who would never behave the way he does to me in front of his parents, in front of anyone else. It's only because his parents allow him to get away with his shitty behaviour that he continues to do it - they give him a free pass because they don't do anything to stop him. He calls me names, he tells me to "fuck off" and says derogatory things about me in front of his parents and they say nothing to him. And if I start yelling at him to stop, I get yelled at and told off and they start to come near me to try to hit me, or throw my things around the place. It's absolutely ridiculous! And on and on I suffer.

Then my step-father continues to mock me at every chance he can get. Everything I say or do is an opportunity for him to mock me and laugh at me. I can ignore him, but he continues to do it, like a rabid animal. And if I tell him to stop it, to stop saying it, he starts getting abusive and wants to hit me. He gets all indignant, like how dare I tell him to stop talking, who the hell am I to tell him to stop talking, that he can do whatever the hell he wants. Sick, sick, sick.

And my mother, well she just leaves the house, totally ignores the situation and pretends it's not happening. But not before telling me off, telling me that its "all in my head" and that I am "mentally unwell" - totally dismissing my health because as far as she is concerned, there is nothing wrong with me. Right, so projecting her son's insanity and her delusions and her husband's volatility onto me because I am standing up for my rights! Oh that's right, I forgot, I don't have any rights in this house (according to them) and they are allowed to control me (again, according to them). Yeah, right, how terrible of me to forget the rules of the mental house and to want to have a peaceful, normal existence! That's just too much for these mentally unwell people to handle.

I am thinking about posting the videos of the other night, when they were abusing me, so that other people can see how awfully abusive they are.

My mother called the police to try to get me arrested

During the fight tonight, my mother called the police because she thought that she would tell them lies (yet again) and they would believe her, so that she could get me locked up or taken to the mental ward! What a freaking mother!

She didn't think that the video I took with all of them threatening me, yelling at me, trying to throw things at me and trying to forcibly take my phone from me would count for anything. She thought that she could lie like she normally did to the police and they would just believe her.

When she was on the phone to the police, she told them that I started yelling and screaming at them, going ballistic and crazy and she didn't know why. I then took the other handset and told the guy that it wasn't the case, that I took a photo of my brother, he went ballistic at me, then I videotaped his reaction and they all went ballistic at me - in other words, the truth! My mother kept interrupting me to say, "she's lying" and the guy obviously believed me because I told him I had videotape that I would show the officers of them all three abusing me.

Three police officers came here and one female officer came with me to the sun room to talk. I told her what happened and then another male officer came and I showed them the video tapes and they heard it all. This time the police believed me. I also told them that every time the police came here before, the three of them (mother, step-father, brother), all lied to the police and kept on saying that I was just crying and screaming at the for no reason, telling the police that I was nuts, lying through their teeth. The police officer understood, he said that it was reasonable that the police attending would believe the three of them against me, because I had no proof otherwise and there was three of them. But since this time I had proof, at least I could back up what I was saying, that it was them who were volatile, violent and abusive and that was the reason why I was crying.

The police officers told me that I needed to get away from this situation, that it wasn't healthy or safe for me, given that they saw the video of the idiot family I have. They also told me that if I needed to call them again, they would come.

They also said that normally people didn't videotape their families and I agreed, but he totally understood why I was doing it. I did tell them that after my brother attacked me last year and each subsequent visit by police officers was a situation of my family lying about what was going on, that I had to use the video to prove what was going on. He understood.

Thank God!

They will now write up at the police station, the outcome - me being abused and that it's the three of them who are the aggressive abusers - which means if they are called again, I can tell the police to look up this job and to watch the video so they can see it's them. They may even get arrested next time!

After the police left, my family were so upset that they got chastised by the police, that the video evidence was irrefutable proof that they were abusing me and that their lies didn't work this time. My brother and mother were angry and yelling in the kitchen about me, trying to devised other ways to "punish" me for letting the police know the truth, because their little plan to have me committed didn't work.

What an awful, horrendous family I have! What assholes they are!

More violence and abuse tonight

What a horrid evening I have had this evening!

Earlier tonight, the three of them (mother, step-father and brother) were having dinner and I was about to go to my bedroom to watch television when I heard the television was still on in LayZ boy's room. I went back into the kitchen to tell my mother and step-father that his television was on and that they seemed to have two rules - one for them and one for me. They yell and scream at me if I leave the TV on for just a moment while I go out of the room (of course I am coming back), but when it comes to them, they can leave a TV on for hours in another room and that's okay. They just told me to get lost.

So I went to my bedroom to get my mobile phone which has a good camera, to take a picture of the idiot brother LayZ boy and he just started yelling at me, calling me a "mental loser", so I started videotaping it all. My step-father then started going ballistic, as did my mother. My step-father tried to throw things at me, but my mother and brother LayZ boy stopped him (he had a knife at one point and was threatening to throw it at me and I was videotaping everything). My mother came towards me to try to take my phone away from me, as did my step-father. My brother kept threatening me, telling me that if he stood up and had to stop me videotaping, then there would be trouble. I kept videotaping everything they said and did - and they did a lot of vulgar, horrible stuff, threatening me non-stop. My mother grabbed my arm trying to get my phone away - I think I have bruises from the violent way she took hold of me, while she was yelling and screaming at me.

The three of them were like wild animals. Finally I caught them in their sick mental behaviour and they did not like it one bit. They kept saying I was sick in the head - yeah me, I don't think so! It's the three of them who are the mentally unwell ones. They just keep on with the violence and abuse and think I "asked for it".

These people are not normal. They act ballistic and mental because I took a photo of my brother and then videotaped his reaction. That was all it took for them to start abusing me!

The photo that I posted here is the one that caused all the problems with them. You cant even see my brother LayZ boy's face, so it's not like he is recognisable. They're just abusive, volatile, violent people who just want to treat me like shit and think it's okay to do so. They're just horrible!

My step-father is violent, volatile and sick in the head

There is really something wrong with my step-father's mental facilities. Seriously wrong.

Just after dinner, I quickly left the family room to go to the toilet and when I came back, he was taking my plate away, telling me how much of a "lazy bludger" I was for leaving my plate there. I told him I just went to the bathroom and was going to rinse my plate when I came back (less than a minute later), he still continued to call me a "lazy bludger". As if my presence back in the room less than a minute later was an insult to him, because it proved him wrong, but he didn't want to admit it! The idiot!

A short while after that, he started to wash the dishes. He then started complaining really loudly what a "lazy, son-of-a-bitch, dirty bludger" I was because he seemed to think I emptied the pan with the herbs I had used for steam inhalation into the sink. Of course I didn't do that, my mother did, but of course he wouldn't believe me when I told him I did not. And in any case, it's not something to get that upset about. He was acting like someone spilled their shit in the sink and he had to clean it up. It was just some wet herbs, for God's sake!

I went to the lounge room where my mother was and told her to tell him to stop accusing me of doing something I didn't do and to stop yelling at me, for no reason! She said she did it, but the idiot, obnoxious, volatile step-father wouldn't take her word and started yelling at me even more loudly, telling me that he was going to "watch me" from now, in case I threw herbs in the sink in future.

Of course it upset me, because he just continues to say really horrible things to me, saying that I am "good for nothing" and "lazy" and "shit" and just yelling at me. He then even started yelling at my mother too, telling her to "fuck off". He was upset that he was proved wrong and got even more mad that he was wrong for yelling at me, so he continued to yell at me more!

And he continued to yell, to no-one, because he was by himself in the kitchen, for over 1/2 an hour, complaining bitterly about everything. When my mother went in there to see what he was complaining about, one of the things was a bowl of cut up cabbage leaves (the end bits that I don't eat) that was going to the chickens in the morning, he was upset that it was on the sink because it was bothering him! And even when I coughed a few times from the other room, he started complaining about my coughing, as if I was putting it on or something when I am not yet recovered. What a foolish idiot he is!

He is getting more and more volatile and sick in the head.

All he ever does is yell, complain and yell some more. There is absolutely no reason for it. He is a sick man!

Abusive, angry controlling step-father

This morning was the morning for cleaning the house, so that meant I had to wake up early and leave the house because I am allergic to dust and dust mites.

My step-father told me I had to move my bags which were next to a tallboy in the lounge room downstairs because he didn't want them to be there. I told him to just leave them, that I would take care of them when I came back home. That was not an unreasonable request.

He wouldn't hear of that. He started screaming at me and told I had to do what he told me to do, that this was his house and he didn't want my bags there (they had some items of crockery which I hadn't packed away into the cupboards in the kitchen and a bag of CD's).

I was in the kitchen at this point, making a smoothie for breakfast (a quick breakfast so that I could leave quickly and not upset him because you never know when he's going to blow, he's so volatile). My step-father was screaming at me while we were both there and then threw a bag he was holding at me. Luckily it only had plastic bags in the bag (my mother recycles her plastic bags) and then they fell in the sink that was filled with water. I asked him, "what the hell is wrong with you to throw this at me?" and he responded by telling me that I had to move my things right now or else he was going to smash everything.

I followed him into the lounge room as he started to move my things to the door, so that he could take them downstairs, into the garage. I asked him what the point was for putting things in the garage, when I had to bring most of it back up again, because it belonged in the kitchen mainly. He told me he didn't care, that I had to just do what he told me to do because this was his house and if I didn't like it, I could "piss off" out of there and I should just "fuck off". He also called me a lazy bludger (of course he did because he cant think of anything else to say).

He then hit me. He hit my arm - he lashed out at me because he was angry and I threw the glass I was carrying onto the floor - it still had some of the smoothie in it - and the glass broke, shattering all over the floor and there was purple liquid everywhere on the floor too. Then my step-father went off his head again, screaming at me even more, calling me horrible things even more. This is such an untenable situation for me to be in and the violence, chaos and abuse I am constantly subjected to.

I was so upset by him screaming at me, for absolutely no reason whatsoever and that is why I threw the glass on the floor. It is unbelievably frustrating living with these people who yell and scream at me, flinging abusive words and actions at me because they cant control their emotions and take out their anger on me.

My family lives in fear of everything

Another thing I realised about this family is that they live in fear and that is how they operate their lives. Every single thing they do, every action they take, every behaviour they chose, is based on their fear. Fear of everything.

They are so hypocritical and so unaware of their behaviours that when I put the mirror up in front of them, they cant handle it and get really angry with me, as it makes their fears almost unbearable for them.

My mother and her superstitions has a lot to answer for! My step-father and his volatile anger has a lot to answer for! My brother with his vicious vindictiveness has a lot to answer for!

Their fears have infected me too. It's such a struggle for me not to feel like certain things are possibly tainted to the point where I cant eat them.  I have realised it's just a fear based on my mother's insanity, telling me that things people gave me were cursed and could hurt me (and in fact, she would take away some of the things people gave me as gifts, because she believed that they would hurt to me even touch them), so of course I internalised that, as a young girl, into a fear of everything possibly hurting me, because if innocuous things from people (who were friends of the family) gifts  to me (ie clothes etc) could hurt me, then everything could, including food from people I didn't know!  So no wonder sometimes even now I get stressed about things I get from other people, thinking that they could contain some harmful thing and hurt me.

Jeez, it's so obvious now, more than ever what the source of all that has ailed me internally has been, but when I used to think these thoughts, I thought that there was something really wrong with me and I didn't know why I was having these thoughts.  It's just so obvious now where they came from isn't it?

My step-father just gets so angry so quickly - he's really volatile and growing up, I never knew when he would suddenly get upset, start yelling at me, making me feel scared and threatening to hit me (or actually hitting me).

My brother, has absolutely no boundaries - he does whatever he wants to do and doesn't give a damn about what anyone else wants or thinks because it doesn't concern him and doesn't affect him. He's so selfish and self-centred.

It makes me sick that I have been subjected to such crappy sickness from these people and then to add insult to injury, they blame me for everything. They refuse to take any responsibility for their actions, their words or behaviours, as if they did nothing wrong and I am the one who is wrong for ever bringing these things up.