LayZ boy the vindictive lunatic

LayZ boy has not had a reaction from me for weeks now. And he cant handle it. He continues stomping through the house most days because he wants attention and wants to upset me in some way. Idiotic lunatic!

If he hears that I am outside, he immediately comes outside to have a cigarette, but I hear him most of the time and am already in the sun room before he can light up a cigarette and blow it in my face, the asshole.

Today, unfortunately, I was too slow.

I went outside just before and I called out to the cat.

Very soon after that, while I was playing with the cat, LayZ boy came outside and as soon as I started to walk back inside, he had lit up his cigarette and blow the cigarette smoke on my face.

His mother was there too, but she just stood silently, watering the garden, pretending it wasn't happening. Great way to encourage her lunatic son to keep on behaving this way, just ignore it and therefore he thinks he cant continue to do it, because his mother wont say a word. Even his step-father, the aggressive one that he is, would tell off LayZ boy for doing that. Besides which, LayZ boy wouldn't do it in front of his step-father, for the very reason he would be told off.

I simply cannot believe I am related to idiots such as these two. I simply cannot fathom the depths of their mental illness. They are just very sick people. Very sick.

LayZ boy is a stalker lunatic

I swear that LayZ boy has severe and major mental problems.

He sits in his room, curtains drawn, so that it is dark inside, television on, usually watching videos all day, sweating, smelly and vile.

Then, he goes out for a cigarette every hour or so and he walks past my room, to see what I am doing. He walks up and down stalking me, to the point where I am about to draw my curtains when I hear him go outside.

He is one sick lunatic!

What the hell is wrong with him and why is he looking into my room? What does he want to try to steal?

He is so jealous, so vindictive and such an idiot. He hates it that I have more than him and he wants what I have.

His idiot mother used to make me give my stuff to him when we were little kids, so now he thinks he has a right to my things. Assholes the lot of them.

And the thing is, if I tell him mother what he is doing, because he is such a good liar and manipulator, he'll tell her he didn't do that, that I am lying to make him look bad and she will believe him. And if she did believe me, she'd tell me that there is nothing wrong with him walking past my room, outside, up and down, like a stalker. Sick, sick, sick people!

I just want to shake the stupidity and lunacy out of them both!

Idiot!

LayZ boy is incredibly jealous of me

I have a good singing voice.

I have always wanted to be a singer but I get a bit shy and embarrassed when I try to sing in front of other people, so I have never pursued a singing career. I get a bit embarrassed that I start singing off-pitch when I am around other people. I am getting better, but it is hard for me to sing in front of others. I don't have the confidence.

Anyway, I have always felt confident singing in front of my family, because I always have sung in front of them. Maybe I should have tried to imagine I was at home, singing in the bathroom when I have sung in front of other people. I have sung karaoke and I get so nervous that my hand shakes. I do okay most of the time, because I talk myself into it, but I am so nervous.

And the interesting thing about my singing, is that I have a really good opera singing voice. Apparently I am a mezzo soprano, which means I can sing high and lower notes too. I find opera singing so easy-breezy, like it's nothing for me. I do enjoy it.

LayZ boy is very jealous of my ability to sing well and on key and in pitch.

Lately, he's trying so hard to sing. He's not actually singing, but talking in a slightly rhythmic way (that's how he seems to think singing happens).

LayZ boy has this intense need to compete with me. He always has. He fails miserably in any case, as he cannot sing and I can.

It's quite funny to hear because no matter how hard he tries, he doesn't have a singing voice.

This is very much like when we were kids. Anything I do, he wants to do too because he wants to be like me because he's so insecure about himself and thinks that I am smarter and better than him.

Lunatic!

Hyocrisy in action

The house I live in at present with the lunatic nutcase family has a slow combustion cast iron fireplace in the family room, to heat the house.

After the argument tonight, the mother and step-father went out to their local pub and told me to get out of the family room, otherwise they were going to spray it with LayZ boy's strong perfume, because they know it affects me adversely (I have multiple chemical sensitivities).

Now, their son is at home, but he is more concerned with behaving like a manic nutcase and banging on walls and making off-key attempts to sing (and annoy me), smoking his cigarettes and just making lots of noise, than to keep the fire going for his parents, so that it's still warm when they get home.

Needless to say, the fire has gone out, as it's been several hours since they left and the fire has not had more wood put on it. I wont. I normally do, but I wont today after their vile behaviour.

They, of course wont chastise LayZ boy for not keeping the fire going. They don't because as far as they are concerned, he doesn't need to be responsible for anything, only me. As if that is fair or normal. It's just such hypocrisy to have all these expectations of me, but none of him. And, to put the onus and responsibility on me, when they put none on him.

What are they going to do when they get old and sick and LayZ boy is still living here? Are they going to continue to do everything for him - wash his dishes, wash his clothes, warm the house for him?

The hell house with the insane people continues

These people who call themselves my immediate family are not normal, not sane and certainly not nice.

Just a few minutes ago, my step-father started banging on my door loudly and telling me, viciously that I was going to "burn down the house" and called me a "lazy idiot" because I had food warming up in the oven, at low heat, for 30 minutes. What a moron!

I was just about to finish reading a page and then in about a minute, I was going to turn the oven off and get my food out. But no, he has to harass me about it and be mean and derogatory, for no reason other than because he likes to be cruel and abusive to me.

When I got into the kitchen/family room, all three of them were there - mother and step-father laying and sitting on the couch and brother LayZ boy was making himself coffee. I tried to not breathe with my nose, because LayZ boy had put on more of his perfumed products and got out of there really quickly as soon as I took my food out of the oven.

I went back to my bedroom and my mother went ballistic at me, because I left the hallway door open. Obviously I had both hands full with the food tray and had just set it on my bed when she started screaming at me - I didn't even get a chance to go back and close the door. She was vicious and cruel, yelling at me and then banging on my door loudly yelling at me in a nasty way that I "better close the hallway door next time, or else" and then she went  back into the kitchen/family room. What a bitch.

Soon after LayZ boy walked to his bedroom and started yelling out, "Grandpa, grandpa, where are you?" as he walked past my bedroom, like a lunatic.  He's been saying things all day as he walks past my room and of course I have stayed in here and totally ignored him and he cant handle that. What a complete and utter moronic idiot he is.

These people are like wolves baying for me. They are simply not normal and I will not allow them to screw me over any more. I will not. I have kept my distance from them and don't engage with any of them on any level for the last two days, but still they insist on saying nasty and derogatory things to me. There is something seriously wrong with all of them.

These people are not related to me. As soon as I get out of here, I intend to sever all ties with them. I am not going to ever contact them again. They  are dead to me.

Mother is resolutely in denial that her son is a vindictive person

The idiot LayZ boy walks up and down the hallway and starts whistling in this insane way, just to make sure I know he's walking past. He does it to try to annoy me, but I don't react to him, yet he still does it. In-fucking-sane!

His mother told him to stop whistling while he's in the house, that there's no need for it, yet he continued to do it. She told him again to stop. He responded with: "That's how I whistle". She didn't ask him why he was whistling, she told him she wanted him to stop it, but he wont listen because he knows there are no consequences to his actions.

And the whistling is a just a minor thing he does. When they're not home, he starts banging on the hallway walls, just on the other side of my bedroom, so I can hear him, just to try to annoy me. He starts running up and down the hallway, banging on the wall on the other side of my bedroom, like a total lunatic.  He does this to try to antagonise and upset me. And no matter how little I react (I don't even come out of my room - I either turn up the volume on the TV louder or do nothing), the nutcase continues to do it. He gets bored after a while, but it's like his vindictiveness and viciousness gives him energy to be a total lunatic!

Hi mother on the other hand, wont believe he does things on purpose to antagonise and upset me, so this gives him a free pass to continue it. And when she does say anything minor to him, he acts up even more (like a freaking 5 year old child) and she gives up, so he knows how to get around her so she stops saying anything to him. And because his mother wants to deny that he does anything on purpose and wants to deny he has major mental problems, she lets him get away with his obnoxious behaviour.

Idiots all of them!

So tired of these lunatics

I am just so exhausted from arguing with these idiots. Or rather from them constantly arguing with me and from them constantly berating me and blaming me.  And from me having to constantly defend myself, every single day from their stupid lies and accusations.  It is simply exhausting.  

It takes so much energy and I am tired of it, literally and figuratively.  I should know better, because this has been happening all my life, as if they are suddenly, magically going to stop!

Just a few minutes ago, my mother came to my room to tell me I had to take care of my brother, lay-Z boy because, get this, he's now started taking new medication which may cause severe side effects and if he presses his alarm buzzer, I have to take him to the hospital.  She cant stay because she needs to go to the club to do some gambling on the poker machines!  Right! How she can even think that she has any right to ask me is beyond insane, especially when she knows how antagonistic he is towards me.  They are lunatics!

MY GOD!  She is seriously insane!

And she comes to tell me this little tidbit, like it's perfectly normal that 

• my brother needs someone to take care of him
• that the caretaker should be me, since I am at home
• that she does not think it's her responsibility

First of all. How is it my responsibility the medication he takes?  And if she's so concerned, why isn't she there to take care of him? Oh right, her gambling takes first priority!  And they expect me, the one who gets belittled and abused by my brother to suddenly want to take care of him?  What is wrong with these people?

My brother is a total drama queen.  He uses that drama to try to manipulate people into doing what he wants them to do.  But maybe he overplayed his drama this time because even my mother is sick of it and doesn't want to stay here or she just doesn't believe him.  My brother, the lay-Z boy.

Update: My mother actually stayed home because I told her I was not prepared to look after my brother and he scared her enough to make her think the worst.  He's a great manipulator. 

And of course my mother is thinking how selfish I am for  not wanting to look out for my brother, the ones who taunts, abuses and assaults me. Yes, how selfish of me to try to outline some boundaries and limits, to try to assert some control in my existence away from their control.  How terrible I am!

It takes so much of my energy to deal with these people. Oh man, it is exhausting!