My family is mentally unwell - part 2: the brother

LayZ boy, the brother has a range of mental health issues.

LayZ boy is very vindictive and into punishing others for their alleged transgressions against him. He will bide his time, waiting for an opportunity to do something to hurt you, if he thinks he has the power to do so. And to me, he thinks he does, because his mother gives him permission to do so, by always encouraging him and always protecting him. Great.

LayZ boy has psychopathic tendencies.

I watched a documentary about a man who was being tested for being a psychopath and it was just like watching my brother in action. The guy on the doco kept on telling the people studying him that he was very much a narcissist (exactly what LayZ boy has said about himself on many an occasion), he was very paranoid (just like LayZ boy - if I repeat to LayZ boy what he has told me before about himself, LayZ boy accuses me of spying on him) and he was abusive and obnoxious, more so when he thought the cameras were not on and behaved more "normally"when the cameras were on (exactly like LayZ boy, who says and does the most obnoxious and aggressive things when I am not holding a camera but who then behaves like a model citizen when the cameras are on, or when other people are around).

The guy in the doco was also very manipulative and lied a lot (that is also like LayZ boy) and he had no qualms about hurting people (just like LayZ boy) and had very little feelings for anyone else (just like LayZ boy) and didn't think twice about using others (just like LayZ boy).

The other thing that has been happening lately, is that LayZ boy has become even more manic than usual, so I wonder if he also has bipolar disorder too, just like his mother. LayZ boy seems to go on these manic highs and depressive lows, alternating between them. I don't think he really knows what he's doing to some extent.

LayZ boy is very mentally unwell. A normal person would not behave this way.

So no wonder his mother cant see that LayZ boy is so mentally unwell - that is because she is too and is in such denial about her mental health issues, that if she acknowledges her son's mental illness, she has to acknowledge her own and she wont do that.

At least now I have some understanding why.

LayZ boy continues to use his highly perfumed products to make me ill

Yesterday LayZ boy had a shower - the first one in about a month. He's such a slob and doesn't shower very much at all, maybe once a month, if that.

This is the reason why he uses such highly perfumed products - to get rid of the stench of his dirty smell!

LayZ boy also goes to the bathroom, sunglasses on, cigarette in mouth, does his business, doesn't wash his hands and then immediately goes outside to smoke his cigarette with his dirty hands. He is a disgusting pig. Actually that's an insult to pigs, who are clean animals other than rolling around in sludge, they are clean, unlike LayZ boy who is filthy.

So when LayZ boy had the shower, he used his highly perfumed products - shampoo, conditioner, soap, face care products - and pranced all around the house, left the bathroom door open to infuse the whole house with it. And this is knowing full well how allergic I am and how sick I get when I get into contact with this stuff.

I told my mother that it was just abhorrent that he did this. She said nothing, of course, because she defends him. Instead she starts screaming at me, asking me how I can go to the shops when I am that allergic. I told her, that I do with great difficulty and I try to find the person to serve me that doesn't have any make-up on, as they are unlikely to be wearing anything to affect me. She became irrational and told me "everyone wears perfume". Yeah sure, you idiot, everyone does and you have proof of this because you go around smelling everyone. What a foolish, idiotic, irrational thing to say.

I got upset and told her that her son was a narcissist. She replied, "you are", when she doesn't even know what it means. She stood really close to me, like she was trying to being threatening to me. I then told her the story of Narcissus and that LayZ boy confirmed to me that that is who he identified with as soon as he read the story. Then LayZ boy telling me to "stop listening to him" when he is in his room, obviously because he looks in the mirror and tells himself how much he loves himself. As if I stand near his room to listen to his mental ramblings.

They both started yelling at me after that and I just told them that karma would ensure to get them both. They cant treat someone like shit and get away with it like that. No way.

More nonsense

I think my mother is completely delusional, my brother LayZ boy is a narcissistic psychopath and my step-father is totally volatile. It is difficult for me to predict any of their behaviour with any degree of accuracy as they are all emotionally volatile and anything can set them off to spout angry words to me.

My brother LayZ boy used to say, when he was in his late teens that he read the story of Narcissus and he thought that that was exactly the same as him.  He also fell in love with himself when he looked at himself in the mirror and got lost in himself. Narcissus fell in love with himself when he saw his reflection in some water. He has always been in love with himself and has never done anything for anyone else that didn't benefit him in some way. 

In the past LayZ boy would beg me to borrow money and he would tell me that he would even give me interest if I didn't believe that he would genuinely return it within the week. Yes, I got fooled by this so many times. I would lend him money, he wouldn't return it - in fact he refused point blank to return it, telling me it was my own fault for lending him the money and he didn't have to give it back, or to ask my parents for the money. He is so totally selfish and has total disdain for anyone else. He wants, he gets and then he discards. Psychopath.  He is so good at manipulating and lying and he is so good that people really believe him, as he puts his heart and soul into selling himself to you.  Psychopathic liar.

My mother on the other hand, totally molly-coddles her narcissistic son. She wont let him pick up a dishcloth to wash any dishes, because it is beneath him to do anything. So he leaves dirty dishes in the sink every day and she washes them. She wont let him wash his own clothes, because again, it is beneath him to do that, so she washes his clothes, hangs them up to dry, folds them or irons them.  A 40 year old man whose mother does everything for him and excuses all his vileness as lovely quirks of his personality.  What an upstanding human being my brother, Lay-Z boy turned out to be!

It's really hard to accept this about these people, but they are not normal.  Even my step-father, in moments of clarity states that my brother is not normal and will probably die before he is 50 because of his drug addiction, smoking every day (with the lovely smoker's cough), not eating properly and not living normally.  When I tell my mother that even her husband thinks her son is not normal, her response? "Shut your mouth". Oh how lovely huh?  What a lovely thing to say.  She is so completely in denial about her son.

Oh yes, she tells him it's okay to smoke his cigarettes in his bedroom at night.  See how smart she is. He can fall asleep with a cigarette in his mouth/bed one day and set the whole house on fire.  What a nice thing for a mother to want for her son. 

She is such an enabler. She continues to enable his sick behaviour because she is also sick.  She does not know what it means to be normal and that's because she is not and neither is her son. In denial, both of them. So far in denial that they wont ever face the truth, never.

And they blame me because I flash a lovely mirror of reality up to them and they absolutely cannot handle it. They deflect, ignore, get angry or try to blame just so that I can "shut my mouth" about reality as neither of them is willing to face it.