Mother cannot stop lying to me - even about little things

Later this morning, as I was about to leave the house to go to the city, my mother asked me if I wanted to a lift into town because she was going there shortly. I acquiesced, telling her I would appreciate a lift so that I wouldn't have to wait for public transport.

Once in the car, she was just her usual antagonistic, bullish self.

I cant actually talk to her and get a straight answer from her, she always obfuscates, outright lies, evades or pretends she doesn't hear me. Or, she'll answer a completely different question, one I never even asked her! Totally frustrating to have a conversation with someone who doesn't listen to a word you say.

When we got close to the city, I asked her why she was going to the city and the conversation went like this:

Me: So what are you planning to do in the city today?
Mother: Nothing. Just walk around the place. I don't have anything to do here. I just felt like going to the city.
Me: So why are you going to the city when you are not doing anything here? (I am perplexed, as she never just "goes to the city to do nothing")
Mother: No reason, just because.

Then I notice her bag with her towels in the back of the car. She takes hew own towels to her masseuse because she wants to lie on and be covered by her own towels and not the ones used there. So then, the conversation goes like this:

Me: Why cant you just be honest with me and tell me you're going to the city to get a massage?

She proceeds to ignore me, pretending that she never heard me, because she doesn't want to admit she lied about such an inconsequential thing.  Oh, the frustration dealing with someone like her is immeasurable! She is simply unbelievable! She absolutely hates it when people lie to her, she suspects everyone of lying to her and yet, she doesn't stop lying even about minor things, not just to me, but to everyone. She has absolutely no self-awareness at all.
At that point, we reached the parking lot and I told her I was going and left the car and walked to the shops to complete some errands.

No compromise is possible with my family

Last night my mother came into the kitchen, where I was preparing my food for my dinner, to tell me I must get up at 8am the next morning, in order to leave the house so that she and my step-father can vacuum the floors.

I cannot vacuum anything because I am allergic to dust and dust mites. If I am around people who are vacuuming, my body immediately reacts with allergy symptoms almost immediately (itching, blocked nose, runny nose, pain in the sinuses/lungs and painful breathing). I can be sleeping and if they start vacuuming, I get woken up with pain, even though my door is closed, I am that sensitive (unfortunately) that I get so adversely affected.

So when they vacuum the house, I have to leave and go elsewhere. It makes absolutely no sense for me to get up that early, because the only people on public transport will be office workers, all primped and perfumed ready for work and being in an enclosed space with that much perfume will just make me more sick with the allergy symptoms and is not a good idea. I have multiple chemical sensitivities, so being around anyone with any perfumed products just causes my body to over-react with major allergy symptoms, tightening of my bronchi and just feeling itchy all over. My step-father's suggestion in the past has been to tell me to catch the public transport from one end of town to the other, just sit there and do nothing. He has no clue and doesn't want to understand or sympathise. He just calls me a lazy, good-for-nothing layabout because I am sick so much.

When my mother told me about the cleaning, I told her that it would be nice if there was some compromise and not just them telling me what they wanted without actually finding a compromise. The conversation went like this (it was a heated conversation - me begging her and her being so stubborn and refusing to see my point of view):
Mother: You have to get up at 8am tomorrow morning because we are going to vacuum the house.
Me: Look, I need to wash all my linen tomorrow and hang out my duvet and pillows so they can get some sunshine to kill all the dust mites so I cant leave that early.
Mother: Well we have to clean the house tomorrow and we cant do it in the afternoon (they could, but don't want to)
Me: Can we find a compromise where everyone is happy with the outcome?
Mother: There is no compromising with you, you just want it your way.
Me: You are telling me I must do something your way, that is not only autocratic but it is no compromise either.
Mother: Well we cant clean the house in the afternoon.
Me: So why cant you let me get up later in the morning, get my stuff done and then I can leave and you can clean the house. What's wrong with that?
Mother: There is no compromising with you, we cant clean the house in the afternoon.

Then she walked off to the sun room, which is where my step-father was and proceeded to tell him all about our argument in a very angry tone of voice, complaining vehemently about me to him and he starts yelling loudly that "we are not cleaning the house in the afternoon", like they are on a schedule, when neither of them are working and besides which, that was not what I asked!

A little while later, LayZ boy walks into the kitchen, obviously he heard the argument and starting telling me I was "cuckoo" and an "idiot" and "loser". I just ignored him because, really other than lowering myself to his level, there was nothing else I could do.

It is just so difficult to deal with these people.

I dont feel connected to my family in any way

I know today is Mother's Day and part of me still feels some guilt for not doing anything for my mother even though she has been a shitty mother to me most of the time. But still, I feel like it was my responsibility to do something for her, because I know she was expecting for me to at least to make her some dinner if not buy her anything because last night she told me that she put the carrots in a bowl in the laundry as there was no room in the refrigerator, just in case I needed any to cook something the following day. It's so cold in that room (which is not even used as a laundry any more anyway, but rather a storage room) so they can sit there perfectly happy without wilting one bit. She told me this, because I think she was expecting me to make dinner for her on Mother's Day.

Both my mother and step-father were out today, most of the day, not sure where as she doesn't tell me where she is going but last night she did tell me she would be out most of the day, after which she told me about the whereabouts of the carrots and the other vegetables.

Upon coming home, she didn't greet me and neither did I greet her (that is normal these days) and she was looking upset, but pretending that she wasn't while I told her that I removed more infected produce from the pantry (they were infected with pantry moth larvae or eggs) and resorted a few more items and told her that two of her food products on the bench were about to go out of date. She replied with some nonsense how "everything goes out of date some time" and I just walked away to my room. If she could actually be honest about her feelings, we could get somewhere, but she cant and so we wont and it will continue this way.

Earlier today, my guilt about not buying her anything was eating me up and I was thinking that maybe I should at least make her some dinner. But then I heard LayZ boy coming home with her car and that sealed it for me not to do anything. I felt even more resentful about her being so nice to him and treating him so differently to how she treated me, by showing him that he was her favourite, never doing anything about his obnoxious behaviour and never doing anything about the way he antagonises me on purpose ("he doesn't do it when I am around" or "I never see him do it"), so she enables him to be more vindictive and a shithead, by pretending he isn't doing anything purposely malicious to me. Instead of any consequences for his shitty actions, he just gets rewarded and no wonder he continues being a psychopathic idiot towards me, because he knows that his mother will protect him. It just hurt my feelings even more that she made sure he had her car, whereas she just yells at me, accuses me of stealing her keys (of course I didn't) and prevents me from even going into the garage by removing my keys from my handbag without telling (by furtively going into my room, rifling through my bad and taking the keys off the keyring). I wasn't going to show her any kindness either.

I'll just continue to keep to myself and stay disconnected from them, because as far as I am concerned, we don't have a relationship with each other. I just wish this guilt and feeling of responsibility would stop eating at me. I just feel guilty because I know she's upset and so I feel responsible for how she is feeling, as if, it's all my fault. I know it's not my fault, but all three keep telling me it's my fault, so it makes me feel like it is!